A perfectionist, a people pleaser and a Type A personality walk into a room…
What do they all have in common?
My guess is at least one of them might describe you to some degree.
Most of the time it shows up as an urge to ‘do-it-all’ and make sure you do it the best of your ability. Not only do you have super high expectations of yourself (which you can’t ever seem to live up to), but you’ve probably also spent a lot of your life making sure others see you as having it all together and that the people in your life are happy first. King or Queen of the “I got this, don’t worry about it”, you’re great at helping everyone else solve their issues, but find it hard to admit to anyone that you have any problems of your own… like ever.
How does it show up in day to day life?
It’s hard to sit still and do nothing, to-do lists and distractions are your friend. The constant cycle of thoughts, worries, and “what’s next?” are bordering on obsessive. Why? Because staying busy not only gives you a sense of focus and direction, but conveniently also helps you avoid dealing with those pesky emotions that live just below the surface. You know the ones I’m talking about: doubt, insecurity, uncertainty, fear… Having to acknowledge, or even worse, face those uncomfortable emotions means risking the reality that maybe you really don’t have it all together. (But guess what? That’s OK!)
familiar phrases like…
“never good enough”
“I should be able to do this”
“talking about myself is so self-indulgent”
“once I get ______ done, then I can…”
Probably run through your head often. Maybe you even tell yourself that the constant running dialogue keeps you going. Or does it just make you feel worse most of the time?
what has doing it all gotten you so far?
Most likely a good education and career, the job that sounds impressive to most, perhaps a marriage or relationships that at one point really made you happy. But trying to live your life being “perfect”, making everyone else happy, working to keep things “under control” often leads down the same road: to depression, anxiety, addiction, burnout, overwhelm, life paralysis and isolation. But the road doesn’t have to dead end there.
In fact the road to greater happiness, balance, joy, success and love really only requires four key things…
Curiosity, Courage, Compassion and Connection.
That sounds a little too emotional for me. Can’t you just give me the steps?
Sure I can, and through our work together I will... But it’s also going to require you to take a bit of a leap of faith outside of your comfort zone. I know you just want the roadmap and quickest way to fix things, but guess what? What got you here, won’t get you where you want to be. I’m here to help you try things a little differently, so you can finally get a different outcome, a better life.
I bet your logical, rational, scientific, or skeptical brain is probably starting to scream at you now... “This chick is crazy, don’t listen to her! We’re doing just fine on our own. Let’s get out of here and go see what’s happening on CNN.com”.
But just for a moment think about this…
The reality is, we are only guaranteed this one exact moment in life, the present moment.
How much more of your time do you want to waste distracting away your life? It’s time to take that brave, courageous, and powerful step towards your authentic self and happier life. It’s time to invest in yourself in a new way.
I know I can give you the tools. I can walk with you down a new road. I’ll even help you enjoy life on your terms, learning how to do less and feel freer than you’ve ever felt.
But only you can take that first step. Imagine how different everything could be six months from now if you took that step today and got started now. Come on, I dare you!
“Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want so that they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you really need to do, in order to have what you want.”
- Margaret Young